Did You See That?

Um, did you guys see General Hospital today? There were so many random occurrences that I thought I would never see. I'm still in shock and looking for confirmation that they did in fact happen.


First, Patrick Drake actually said he was "glad" he was the father of Robin's baby.


Excuse me?


Mr. I-Never-Want-Children-Because-Bros-Come-Before-Hoes-Grunt-Grunt-Scratch-Scratch?


Even stranger than that, I think I saw him and Robin getting along and get this, smiling at one another. It's been so long since I've seen these two be anything even close to civil to one another that I forgot what it looked like.


Oh now I remember.

It's adorable.


Because the-powers-that-be knew they couldn't completely win back my Patrick love with that one move, they took it a step further. They let him call Carly an "ignorant bitch"!!!!!!


Be still my heart!


Okay, so technically it was Claudia, but she's being played by Carly's original portrayer Sarah Brown, the same actress responsible for Cottage Hell so I'll take it.


It would've been nice (though admittedly unprofessional) if he had said this to the patient's face. However, he did defend Robin's HIV status to Carly, I mean Claudia. This is the second time in a month Patrick has semi stood up to Carly over Robin.



Yes dear, I too was shocked.


I know, I know Patrick technically yelled at Claudia, but once a Carly, always a Carly so I'll take it.


I'm not quite ready to write "I heart Patrick Drake" on my T-shirt yet, but close.


Since we can never seem to escape Carly, we'll continue with the Carly theme.


For the first time in a long time, I was happy to see Carly on my screen because she didn't utter a single word through the entire show. Carly's soul (?) silently hung out at Jake's with Jason while her body was rescued by Ric.



Yes, that's right. Ric Lansing. I know the execs like to write him as the bad guy, but someone out in L.A. has apparently wised up and decided that him fighting for redemption would be a far more interesting story.


Bless you, sir. Bless you.


Last, but certainly not least we were treated to Sonny getting his ass royally kicked by Johnny.




I'm not advocating the gratuitous violence on this show in the slightest; however, after the crap Sonny has put Johnny through for something he didn't even do, I thought it was the least he deserved. I am very well aware this will spark the next great mob war, but it's so rare that we Sonny get his that I'll ignore that fact for now and watch the Sonny ass-kicking on a loop. Should anyone be so inclined, I think it's a hilarious Youtube video waiting to happen.

Caps provided by Laurie.

Just Saying - two weeks edition

General Hospital fans watched a literal cliffhanger when Diego’s car was left hanging over the edge of a bridge. After Jason pulled Elizabeth from the wreckage, he fell backward, knocking himself unconscious and severely damaging his hands. I’m still not sure how he accomplished that last one but whatevs.

Meanwhile, Sam was left to plummet to her death……

......or was she?

The Everyday Hero managed to grab hold of the railing (even though it was a totally impossible feat) and hang on until Lucky came to her aid. That’s right, a wounded Lucky Spencer managed to crawl over to the edge and pull his ex to safety……

…with one arm……

..….all while looking gorgeous.

Who’s the hero now beeyotch?

P.S. - Michael Conforti, I totally heart you for letting Lucky be the hero for once. God knows now that the strike’s over, it’ll be another decade before I see that again.

While the quartet awaited help on the bridge, Diego escaped, but Maxie and Spinelli were hot on his trail, that is, until they hit a minor snag. Maxie managed to get herself stuck in a sewer grate, which while amusing, was totally unbelievable. Why you ask. Simple. Kirsten Storms is tiny and there’s no way she was unable to shimmy through those bars.

Kirsten, I say this with love: Please eat a muffin. Or two.

Being as thin as that fake metal pole is not in, I don’t care what the crazy fashionistas are saying.

When the young sleuths escaped, they tracked Diego to a warehouse on the wharf. Spinelli had an unfortunate encounter with chloroform, so Maxie led the way and ran straight into Diego. She managed to escape from the psycho who resumed his earlier scuffle with Nikolas. Alcazar’s son slipped and accidentally hung himself, which I thought was a just ending.

Nikolas and Maxie lost a lot from this whole mess so it was fitting that they were there in the end and I’m glad neither were responsible for killing the text message killer.

Back at the hospital, Jason received news that had mobsters everywhere rejoicing: he could lose the use of his deadly hands. Elizabeth kept close watch on him, which of course Carly didn’t like. A cat fight ensued and Epiphany broke it up. Now I have a love/hate relationship with this women, but in moments like these, she becomes my best friend:

Epiphany: I need you on 10.
Carly: We're not done yet.
Epiphany: I said I needed Nurse Webber. You will get out of her way and let her do her job.
Carly: You don't need to be pushy.
Epiphany: I said I needed Nurse Webber on the 10th floor. You will get out of her way or, heart attack or not, I will turn you upside down and mop this floor with your hair.

Anyone who stands up to Carly is alright in my book.

Sam also landed herself back in the hospital and Lucky serendipitously found some new leads on her hit-and-run. He watched Monica and Tracy’s very public blow up in the middle of the hospital and now knows she was driving the night of the accident. He also overheard Jason and Liz discussing the possibility that she hit Sam. Poor Lucky confronted them and now he’s trying to keep it covered up. Sam overhead Lucky and Elizabeth’s discussion which was the cherry on the top of her day. Not only could she not be released from the hospital, but her cousin collapsed from a brain tumor and she lost her job at Everyday Heroes. Oh and let’s not forget she’s also under the suspiciously watchful eye of Dr. Devlin, who by the way, is in cahoots with Jerry Jax.

I knew that guy was creepy!

This sucks though because one of Patrick’s friends is now tied to the mob and Dr. Drake’s lack of mob connections was one of his best characteristics. That’s clearly going out the window now because he was even defending Jason against Cruz (he‘s still alive??!!).

Kind of makes you miss Pete Martinez doesn’t it?

Adolescent, bachelor behavior I could deal with. Psycho who lives for illicit dealings, not so much.
I still don’t have Devlin completely figured out, but I don’t have to. He’s clearly bad news. He’s paying way too much attention to the Cassadines and maybe we’ll see why later. I would love to get Monica off the hook so my theory is Devlin hit Sam and feels guilty about it now. I’m not sure about his connection to Nikolas though.

The Dark Prince didn’t take Devlin’s secret drug and refused surgery so he eventually collapsed. He was rushed to surgery where he flatlined and tried to follow Emily to the other side. They met in their engagement party attire (they’re getting a lot of mileage out of that dress). Emily attempted to convince Nikolas that he needed to fight for his son, who apparently has been a victim of SORAS.

However, I’m not completely positive because I can't remember the last time we saw Spencer on screen, so maybe it really has been that long.

Emily said goodbye to her prince, but you know, after the gazillionth time, it’s starting to lose it’s affect. Would it be too much to get some kind of disclaimer telling me if this is the last, last time they’ll see each other or the last, last, last time?

After waking up, Nikolas threw a hissy fit in the OR and the surgery was canned. Mr. Cassadine manages to get enough strength to walk around the hospital and meet Devlin in a dark basement where he scores some illegal pills that will “prolong” his condition.

::Sigh::

If we do another pain pill addiction storyline with Lucky’s brother, I will probably scream. Secondly, has it occurred to anyone that maybe, just maybe the unknown drug Jerry injected into Nikolas at this same time last year, was the cause of this tumor and perhaps tossing more unknown drugs into his system may not be the best idea?

No?

Well, I’m just throwing it out there for you.

A casualty in Nikolas’ outrage was Robin. She was kicked in the stomach which sent Patrick into panic mode. It’s been interesting watching him cope with the idea of fatherhood during this last week. A highlight for me was his chat with Elizabeth.

That relationship has always been one-sided because Elizabeth was always dumping her problems on Patrick so this pep talk was a long time coming. By the end of the week, Patrick and Robin admitted to still loving each other, but as far as Robin was concerned, nothing had changed. That’s progress I guess.

Another child in danger was Michael who was still hiding out at Peg’s and his parents were still concerned about his whereabouts. Maxie and Spinelli tried to help Jason find Michael and I was just as impressed with Ms. Jones’ detective skills as the slacker hacker was. I think it would actually be kind of cool if Maxie went into this P.I. thing. It’d be a nice little tribute to her parents, don’t you think?

I want to compliment the two GH writers for balancing out the scenes between this couple. You get the incredibly sweet moments like the two of them visiting Georgie’s grave on her birthday mixed in with the silliness of Spinelli losing his clothes. Who knew that’s what was under those baggy clothes? Color me impressed.

When Michael still didn’t turn up, Sonny continued pressuring the Zaccharas to return his son and he actually took his frustrations out on Jason. Sorry, but for someone who’s supposed to think so highly of Jason, Sonny treated him like crap by accusing him of getting injured on purpose. I try to not completely despise any character, but good Lord it’s hard to like that guy when he’s constantly acting like a spoiled child who didn’t get what they wanted. Dude needs to learn to be appreciative. For example, be thankful that Kate forgave you for sleeping with Claudia.

Speaking of the newest mobster in town, Claudia attempted to make deals right and left this week to try and get her brother back. This included going to Ric and bargaining for his waterfront properties. Ric rejected her offer because he’s trying to turn over a new leaf, etc. etc., and I really hope it sticks. I’m sure now that the strike’s over, he’s going to return to being the villain, but I applaud the interim staff for attempting to clean up the mess that is Ric and Alexis’ relationship. Ric handed his position as DA back over to Alexis and she was surprised to say the least. I choose to ignore the unrealistic nature of passing a job back and forth like a baton because I want these two to make up. I’ll take anything that can be counted as baby steps towards reconciling a situation that was really screwed up.

Like I said, I’m sure this optimistic outlook will be short lived because Ric found Mariana down on the docks with a dead Randy. Meanwhile, at the same time in the same place, we had Michael confessing to Carly, Claudia exchanging shipping lanes with Sonny in return for Johnny and Trevor putting a hit on Claudia. Of course all these people were in the same location of course, the execs had an excuse to blow something up again.

This time the bomb wasn’t exactly the work of another mobster. Spinelli accidentally activated the explosive devices Diego planted and we’ll have to wait for Monday to see who survives the wreckage.

I realized this post was slightly more positive than usual, but no worries. With the writers’ strike over I’m sure I’ll be back to my overly critical self in no time. With the old team at the helm, the show will likely return to the shipwreck we all know and love to hate.

I’m just saying.

Screen caps courtesy of Clarissa.

Just Saying - February Sweeps

So apparently when I said it would be a couple days, I clearly meant a couple of weeks. You know how it is when your evil twin who slept with your best friend’s father and was brutally murdered by the mayor’s crazy grandmother returns from the dead ……you have a lot of catching up to do.

I too have a lot to catching up to do as far as General Hospital is concerned so let’s get to it.

First of all, I was having a hard time remembering this was a sweeps month considering there was no giant catastrophe involving the entire cast as there have been during recent Februaries (MetroCourt hostage crisis, epidemic, Port Charles Hotel fire, etc). However, it was like all other sweep months in one respect - it kicked off with another flippin' pointless death.

Coop was found dead from an apparent suicide by hanging. Everyone, but Maxie, was convinced that he was guilty of being the text message killer and the drive to clear her boyfriend’s name led to an unlikely partnership between her and Spinelli. I’ve really been enjoying their scenes, probably because they are two young talented actors and because Kirsten Storms is a chemistry machine. I’ve really liked all of her pairings, from Matt Marraccini, to Jason Cook all the way back to her Disney channel days with Gregory Smith.

Yeah, I took it there.

Something that irks me, however, is the-powers-that-be are hitting some nerves with their storytelling. For example, Maxie’s already kissed Spinelli and poor Georgie spent months with him and got nowhere near first base. Granted, this kiss was a diversion, but I’m still angry that the writers gave Georgie yet another unrequited love when I’m convinced they already knew she was on her way out. Secondly, while the black and white flashbacks are cute, they’re awfully reminiscent of Dillon’s movie daydreams with Georgie.I adored those two and trying to redo that magic with this new soon-to-be couple (I'm assuming), doesn’t sit well with me. I think it’s still a little soon.

Anywhos, the spunky Jones girl was correct and unfortunately for Sam, the text message killer was still on the loose, clearly one more way karma was waiting to bite her in the butt. It all started when Liz told Lucky all of the nasty things the ex(?) con woman pulled in the name of revenge against Jason and Liz. This led to Lucky terminating his newfound relationship and while I was glad to see the Spencer boy stand up for himself, I hated to see him play the fool again.

I guess it had to be done to set up a story that I, for one, did not foresee.

Sam once again received threatening texts and when she called Lucky for help, he accused her of lying. Apparently for adults, the story of “Peter and the Wolf” features a serial killer instead of a furry animal. The TMK attacked Sam and their scuffle lands them on the outskirts of town during a rainstorm because you know, execs will find any reason to get Kelly Monaco soaking wet.

I know Sam’s supposed to be crafty and whatnot, but after her numerous assaults, don’t you think she would have learned to wear more sensible shoes? The "everyday hero" escaped the killer only to be hit by a car (talk about bad luck) and the driver could be Monica, Liz or Carly. I honestly never saw this coming and I was so excited to be surprised by something; however, I just wished the TMK storyline had been resolved before we kicked off the who-hit-Sam mystery.

While Sam was in the hospital recovering, Spinelli and Maxie decided Logan was the real killer and Lulu found a lot of incriminating evidence to support their theory. Logan tried to explain, but when Johnny showed up, he freaked and grabbed Lulu who ended up knocking him in the head with a wrench. Now soldier boy is in a coma and oh, and by the way, not the killer. I actually like the coma angle because it’s very soapy and nearly killing someone ties her back to her mother.

TMK is still on the loose and while the police start looking for him, he’s busy waiting for Sam at her apartment. Ladies and gentleman, the surprise of the month - the text message killer is Diego Alcazar!!!??!!!
I. Was. Floored.

There were no words for that little twist. Actually, there were words. I think it was something like “What the hell?” ...... repeated many times.

I actually liked this move for a couple of reasons. One, it’s totally soapy. Two, GH has been really bad about killing people with no signs of bringing them back. This gives me hope that they have not forgotten this little trick and in the future, some of these ridiculous deaths will be undone. For example, Lorenzo. I’ve always thought his return was possible because the audience never saw the death. Now that they revived Diego, a death we clearly saw, I know it’s totally doable. Third, I feel justified that Diego didn’t die because I always thought it was lame that he went out with one shot.

It was interesting the way he explained his motives and stuff, but Georgie’s death didn’t sit well with me. Diego said Georgie took Maxie’s place and he “almost” felt bad about her demise. Okay, that makes no sense.

Yes, I do know what soap I’m watching, but I expected a better explanation.

Diego couldn’t have mistaken Georgie for her sister because she was out in the open and clearly doesn’t look like Maxie. Secondly, Georgie stood up for Diego a lot and he decided to repay her by killing her? Um, no.

Diego’s scheme escalated when he took Sam and Elizabeth (wrong place, wrong time) on a ride that resulted in the car crashing and hanging over a bridge. Lucky showed up and before he can help, Diego shot him.

For the love of God, can Lucky ever NOT get shot and maybe be the hero for once?

Of course not, because here comes Jason to save the day.

P.S. - lame CGI. Go back to the-horrible-spinoff-that-shall-not-be-named and stay there.

Speaking of TMK victims, Emily continued hanging around Nikolas this month and she has become less perky about her posthumous state. During a seizure, Nikolas was able to see who really killed Emily, but to complete the memory, he had to go to Wyndermere where he and Emily relived their horrific engagement evening. It was really sad and I’m not sure dragging this out and having these two have to part again made for an entertaining storyline. I really do hope that these two get a better send off.

Even though Nikolas has the answer to who killed Emily, he still has his tumor because he’s a Cassadine and they can never be happy. Dr. Devlin put himself on this case and is pushing the prince to agree to an experimental treatment as long as he doesn’t tell anyone.

Oh this is going to end well.

I really don’t like this guy. He keeps yacking at Robin about being afraid to try an experimental drug which, by the way, is ridiculous.

Let’s review:

Robin and Patrick are always drug therapy vs. surgery. Robin has used experimental therapies in the past (i.e. Jason) so why are they suddenly making her all anti-experimental drugs? Is there a maximum on the number of GH doctors allowed to use experimental drugs? Either way, this dude is so shady and I was super excited to see him freak at the sight of Jerry.

No one screams shady quite like Jerry Jax and I’m glad to see my skepticism of the new doc is justified. Seriously, do they hire just anybody at this hospital? Have they ever heard of a background check?

Now that we’ve covered the death, why don’t we switch over to the life?

Robin found out she was pregnant and spilled the beans to Patrick and I have already discussed how much I hated her lie. Well, obviously no one cares about my feelings because the lie continued. Someone who did comment on the pregnancy was Nadine and for the first time I was thankful for Aunt Raylene. The new nurse’s ramblings gave Scrubs fans the morning after scene they were deprived of after the baby’s conception and I think it was a nice flashback.

Something that really bothered me about the pregnancy (in addition to everything else) was that none of Robin’s family got any kind of recognition scene. Maxie came to the hospital asking for help a couple of times and never acknowledged the baby. I thought maybe they didn’t know, until Mac mentioned the baby matter-of-factly. I’m really disappointed we didn’t get any happy “Uncle Mac, I’m pregnant” scenes. It was during the one Robin/Mac scene that’s allotted for each sweeps period, Patrick overheard Robin mention the baby’s father and things started to fall into place for him.

February was a good month Patrick’s character because I started to remember why I used to like him. The biggest thing was him was standing up to Carly. I have been dying for that moment and here’s what happened:

Jax: Oh. So who -- who do we congratulate, then?
Patrick: Robin went to a sperm bank, actually.
Carly: Couldn't find a real one?
Jax: You know --
Patrick: It was very brave and independent of her......

Sure, it wasn’t as aggressive as I would have liked, but considering I thought that day would never come, I’ll take it. Taking a slight tangent ......... I have to say I am so irritated that these women have to share their pregnancies at the same time as one another. You know this is going to end badly. At best, this feud is now going to continue through their children, at worst, someone is going to think a baby swap/stealing storyline will be ingenious.

FYI, it’s not, so don’t even try it. That means you, Mr. Head Writer.

Anyway, let’s try and refocus on the pretty.

That’s better.

So Patrick continued speaking highly of Robin to her and to others, did nice things for patients and gave her presents. I thought it was all sweet, but then I later realized that some of the gestures were probably him trying to get her to admit the truth about the baby. I’m not thrilled about the passive aggressive manner, but the truth is now out there and I am beyond relieved that there was no third party involved with this reveal. It was Patrick and Robin, one on one and I am so thankful that this lie did not last for months. Considering how bad this story was messed up, I’m surprised, but happy to see something go semi-right.

Another shock for me was seeing Luke reappear so soon and he’s probably rethinking the intelligence of that plan right about now since the Q’s are at war with one another. Tracy slapped Monica with a malpractice suit and Monica kicked Tracy out of HER house (the one Alan gave to her). Tracy has taken off the gloves and decided she doesn’t want Luke back and I’ve enjoyed watching her regain her spunk. Her fierceness matches her new fierce haircut. Luke doesn’t know the meaning of the word quit and he makeup to Tracy by discovering that Monica’s been becoming/is an alcoholic. It’s entirely possible she hit Sam in her drunken state and while I’m glad to see her get a storyline, I hate that it puts her in such a negative light. It could be worse I guess. She could be a track-suit wearing apparition slash manifestation of Tracy’s conscience.

Over on the docks in mobland, Claudia Z hit Port Charles. In case you missed it, the character’s being played by Carly's original portrayer, Sarah Brown. I thought her trips down memory lane were cute.........

......and I was prepared to like her for the simple fact that she bullies "Trevors," but now I'm not so sure. There was no buildup to her and Sonny jumping in the sack (wasted opportunity I say) and I hate that their now turning her into another woman scorned. I’m concerned she’s quickly going to turn into (or back into ?) another Carly and I’m pretty sure I can only stand one of her.

As I mentioned, Carly is pregnant, which I think is horrible idea since she can't handle the children she already has. Michael is taking after his father and decided to buy a gun to protect his family. The mini mobster accidentally shot Kate and then skipped town to avoid punishment. In my opinion, it would have been more dramatic if he shot Carly and endangered the baby, but whatevs. It still caused sufficient drama with Sonny who has gone off on a tirade against the Zaccharas who are actually innocent.

Ric would typically be in the middle of all of this, but he went on a journey to find himself and I thought that meant he would get a break from all the mob craziness, but I was wrong.

That’s what I get for thinking I guess.

While away, Ric met a woman named Marianna (recast twice in one month) who he is falling for, but it turns out she’s working for Trevor. Can this guy ever get a break? I really want him to get past all this brother/father angst so why can’t we give Ric some mental illness and let him have a clean slate ? The malfunction in Ric‘s brain could be operated on by Patrick, preferable shirtless, and that could be your whole episode. Toss in a little gratuitous shirtless Lucky and you could call it a day. Now that's my idea of an ideal sweeps month.

I'm just saying.

Thanks to Clarissa and Kim for caps.

The Comeback

Hey all. Miss me? Now that the strike's officially over, I can once again pick up my pen, I mean my keyboard, and share my daytime rants with the world.

Truthfully, I absolutely support the writers, but my absence was not my version of the strike beard. It was actually due to this insane wave of busyness that decided February would be a nice time to crash my life.

Anywhoozle, look for my thoughts on General Hospital's sweeps in the upcoming days and thanks to all of you how have continued to hang around my humble little corner of the Web.

Cynic out!

Baby Blues Part III

The way this storyline is going, this is probably going to become a weekly post.

Let me start off by saying that Kimberly McCullough and Jason Thompson rock my socks off. In the short time that Robin and Patrick were given today to digest the concept that Robin is pregnant, those actors said so much. The emotions were completely palatable. I found their scenes quite griping, I think because in recent soap breakups, the regret seems onesided (see JaSam/LnL2 debacle).

I was alright with the fact that Robin blurted out the news to Patrick because it's believable and it was so nice to see Patrick being loving and less of an ass. I was actually enjoying myself....
.....and then the peanut gallery walked in.

I get the added drama of an audience, but Kelly and the Stan fill in would have been sufficient. The writers think it's cute shoving all these Night Shit (that's what I said) characters down my throat and I have news for them, it's not. If I was considering watching that crap spin-off, this would totally turn me off to that idea. Patrick and Robin are two legacy characters that I care about with a once-in-a-lifetime story to tell, so why is that they (especially Robin) are getting shafted on airtime?

Even more than the lack of airtime, I hate, hate HATE that the writers decided Robin should lie. What would have been great was if Robin hadn't said anything and just let everybody assume that Patrick's explanation was the truth. Robin could have just been quiet or hell, she could have gotten called away (where's that darn pager when you need it?) before the audience arrived and Patrick could have given his wrong version of the story. Kelly could have filled Robin in later and she could have run with it without actually telling a lie.

I continue to be amazed at how dispointing this story has become.

Is it too late for a do-over?

Bang-up Makeovers

Whenever a soap actor gets a haircut, it seems like half the cast gets a new 'do. The recent trend among the women is bangs and I thought it was time for a shallow post.

Wow! Now that was a surprise. I was not expecting such a dramatic change, but I like it. Jane Elliot is totally rockin' that cut.

Also shocking was Megan Ward's new bangs.

They're not hideous, but I think they detract more than they enhance her already gorgeous hair.

Although these bangs aren't new, they did have a less than flattering experience last week.

I would look scared too Becky Herbst.

That's better.

The same hair stylist worked his/her magic on Kimberly McCullough's bangs...
... and then he/she was fired for doing something nice for the character of Robin and substandard beautician stepped in.

Really, guys? Please stop abusing Kimberly McCullough for being naturally adorable.

Caps provided by Clarissa.

Baby Blues Part II

Leo: ....hey, it's good you had me run those HIV tests earlier after you spent the night with Robin. Now you can let her know you're not infected even though the condom broke and everything will be fine.
Patrick: Yeah, now that I know I'm not infected, I think it's better that I don't say anything. At least that way we don't have to have that awkward conversation about what happened that night, what it meant or didn't mean.

Um, are you trying to piss me off? You have the opportunity to tell this ground-breaking HIV pregnancy story and this is the way you do it? Wow.

So in case you missed it today, this little lockerroom convo was overheard by Robin who has decided to keep the pregnancy to herself now that she knows Patrick isn't infected. Give me a freakin' break!!! This is so wrong on so many levels!!!

1.) This never should have been an oops pregnancy.

2.) Patrick's a freaking doctor. He knows that if a condom broke there's a chance Robin could get pregnant. Uh, does he not think he should mention it to her since that would throw a wrench into her plans of going to a sperm bank?

3.) Robin would never not tell the father given her history with paternity issues. If the writers go this route, it's only so Carly can stick it to Robin and call her a hypocrite, you know, because the writers seem to think we enjoy watching the banshee tell everyone how horrible they are so she doesn't have to focus on what a wreck she is.

4.) Why the hell would take an already unique storyline and water it down by making it like every other pregnancy in the history of soaps? Paternity secrets are overdone and no one cares anymore. Not to mention how ridiculous it's going to sound if Robin tells Kelly and everyone else she hooked up with some random guy. Robin is not that type of character so who's going to believe her?

God!!! I can't..... I just.... I have no words. No words could ever possibly convey the magnitude of my disappointment. Way to go GH. Another dissatisfied customer.

Baby Blues

Robin Scorpio is finally pregnant and while I'm sure Scrubs fans everywhere are rejoicing, I, quite frankly, am all kinds of disappointed. Not to bring them down, but I was really hoping for something unique for this couple. Oops pregnancies are daytime staples (i.e. Lulu, Skye, Elizabeth) and switching it up would be a nice change. I understand accidents are more dramatic, but I think the powers-that-be severely underestimate the need for a different kind of drama.

I, for one, think it would be nice if someone had a planned pregnancy for once. I was really hoping Robin would be that one soap heroine that did things the traditional way, you know, find a boy, sex him up, get married and then plan a pregnancy. I think GH execs have proven that they are incapable of thinking outside the box, but I believed they would be forced out of said box given Robin's medical history.

Wrong again.

Robin and Patrick's love story has been unique because of it's pacing. It's been incredibly realistic which makes it relatable and enjoyable. I'm sure they'll end up together eventually, but now it's going to seem more like Patrick will step up (assuming he does) because he doesn't want to be like his father instead of he loves Robin and they came to the decision together about wanting a child. This way, he's thrust into fatherhood, but I think it could have been much more entertaining to watch him come to the realization on his own.

The other complaint I have is the exec's attention to the medical issues of this story. Okay, so if Robin's pregnant, that means the Patrick could be infected so it's HIV waiting game part two and let me tell you, the results of the first saga were a huge letdown. Secondly, I thought the odds of Robin getting pregnant accidentally were zero because of all the precautions they take. After telling me, the viewer, these facts repeatedly and then suddenly getting Robin pregnant without planning it, makes no sense. If the higherups chose to write the story so that Patrick and Robin didn't use protection because of her grief over Georgie or whatever, that will be so irresponsible and completely out of character for Robin. Then again, I don't think anyone could accuse the GH execs of always being responsible or always keeping people within character, so if the story does go this unfortunate route, I won't be surprised, but I will certainly be disgusted.

It's out of my hands now so I guess I should just call this GH disappointment #3,478 and try not to focus on all of the ways this could get worse.

Line of the Day

Elizabeth: There's no way in hell I'm letting you anywhere near my children.
Sam: You always say that like you've had immaculate conceptions and boy do we know that's not true.

So that was pretty much amazing because if you've been anywhere near the Internet during the past year, you know it isn't difficult to find posts about Jason being a saint because he's always saving the day etc. etc. This also makes me wonder if the new writer does surf soap sites because the immaculate conception thing had been brought up previously in the form of this little number:

Sadly, I got this from a friend who got it from a friend and so on and so forth, so I don't know the original artist, but he or she is a genius. Once you make it past any irreverent, religiously insulting aspect of the picture, it is rather amusing and kind of accurate, don't you think?

Since Mr. Temporary Writer is possibly answering the demands of online fans, I'd like to request Carly screaming less often, Jason shooting fewer people and Patrick and Lucky walking around shirtless at all times.

Thanks!

Comings And Goings

The ever-revolving door of daytime continues spinning and it looks like some actors are on their way out of soapland.

*Julie Pinson from DOOL is apparently on her way out.

This really is too bad because I've liked her portrayal of Billie now that her sole purpose isn't sitting there and pining after Bo. I've also been enjoying the mother/daughter relationship she has with Chelsea. Maybe this decision was made by scabs and it will be reversed?

* Jackie Zeman from GH has had her contract status downgraded.

Yeah, I pretty much hate GH's treatment of all vets and this is no different.

*Robin Christopher from GH is poised to make an exit.

I read that Christopher wanted to move her family back east (and now I can't find the article) so it makes me think this was her decision. I'm less bitter about an exit if I know it is the actor's choice, but what does bother me is that in recent months, her talent's been wasted, of course that could be said about the majority of the GH cast. Hopefully Skye's exit isn't accompanied by a hail of bullets and another Quartermaine funeral.

Just Saying

Luke: What fresh hell is this?

Exactly.

Every episode of General Hospital feels like 40 minutes (thank you once again fast-forward button inventor) of hell these days and this week was no exception.

To kick things off this week we had the New Years episode, which was beyond depressing. Let's review:

*Jax was sick and missed the party at his own hotel.

*Said party was not even shown. I know it's not a big deal, but I'm a fan of tradition and I was starting to think of the Metro Court party as a tradition of sorts. Oh that's right, they were axed due to budget cuts.

*Jason ditched Elizabeth, probably to kill someone. Now there's a guy who has his priorities straight.

*Nikolas spent the evening with is fianceé..................who just happens to be dead.

*Sonny was arrested.

(sidenote: apparently Courtney's loft was shipped to Manhattan and converted into an art gallery so Lainey and Kelly are just as homeless as Robin.)

*Robin and Patrick argued. Then made up. Then lost the patient that Georgie had recommended to Robin.

Oh yes. The new year is going to be a bright one.

Sadly, the rest of the week was not an improvement.

Luke had another version of hell where he dressed in drag at one point.

Okay, small "hee!" but seriously, did we really need to be subjected to yet another hell and not a very amusing one at that?

Lulu was kidnapped, again, and I couldn't care less.

Felicia is surprisingly still in town, but apparently it's just so she can be verbally abused by Maxie (not that it isn't warranted).

Alexis and Diane were both nominated for some lawyery award and while I'm amused, why can't veteran actors be used for more than just comedy?

I will toss out one compliment this week and it goes to the scenes where Alexis walks in on Skye and Ric who were obviously otherwise occupied. The dialogue was full of double meanings and because I have the maturity of a 3rd grader when it comes to dirty jokes, I chuckled once ............ okay maybe twice.

Alexis: Ah. I didn't mean to interrupt a meeting.
Skye: No, I can go.
Ric: No, no, no.
Alexis: No, don't -- sit. You look very comfortable. So if you're in the middle of a merger of some sort, I don't want to interrupt.
Ric: No, no. Uh, thanks for coming.

So other than that, this week was beyond painful. You know a show is getting bad when you only have to watch four episodes and you still would have preferred a root canal to reliving that viewing experience.

I'm just saying.

Caps provided by laurieluvsliason.

Looking Back: 2007 in Review

Most people like to do a best and worst at the end of the year, but looking back, I find it virtually impossible to find anything good about General Hospital in 2007. This is more of a storyline recap, just in case you were wondering why yours truly (and several others as recent ratings indicate) think GH has been in a steady decline.

The Cassadines

I know life for a Cassadine is tough, but man did this year suck for them. Let’s start with Alexis. She battled lung cancer despite the fact that she never smoked and what could have been a kickass story for a kickass actress got very little attention after the start of the year. Apparently with Alexis, there is no such thing as too much misery because the tragedy kept piling up. In addition to cancer, she was arrested for smoking pot to cope with the chemo effects, had Molly taken away in yet another custody battle, was dancing on the edge of another pairing with a psycho and then developed appendicitis at the exact moment she was trapped on Spoon island with doctors, but none of the appropriate medical equipment. What do you think about all of this Alexis?


Exactly.

Her daughter’s year wasn’t much better. Sam was given another backstory where she was a con woman who married rich men and divorced them. She killed one of the men (in self-defense of course) and his daughter sought vengeance by giving Sam her own television show.

:::crickets:::

Yes, she wanted to make her famous and then take it all away. That was her diabolical plan.

:::crickets:::

Ladies and gentleman, the first idiotic storyline of 2007.

Amelia, you are an embarrassment to soap villains everywhere. I will say that despite the crappy material, Annie Wersching was not a bad actress, especially when compared to her temporary recast. Someone out there must agree because I believe she’s currently filming for 24 and because of that, her character's been MIA. This is definitely one story I’m not sad to see go.

Sam’s year got steadily worse as she discovered she could not have kids, allowed Jake to be kidnapped by a slightly deranged guest on her show, hired men to threaten Elizabeth and her children, lost Jason and then once again did the adultery thing when she slept with Lucky while still married to Liz. While totally skeevy, I’m willing to let that last one go in the name of hotness. Just in case you missed the steamy hookup:

Trust me, it was hot.

Our final Cassadine is prince Nikolas. His year started off battling Helena to reclaim his son. Then he survived the Metro Court explosion only to be once again be taken hostage by Craig/Jerry. GH’s newest villain injected Nikolas with some poison to keep him in line and when Robin found out about it, he forced them to pretend they were in love.

Idiotic storyline #2.

Nikolas survived that and reunited with Emily right before he started having random rage outbursts, lost the love of his life in his own house after becoming engaged said love and then regained lost love in the form of a ghost or some hallucination, which may or may not be caused by an inoperable brain tumor that could be genetic.

Hooray for surviving, I guess?


The Quartermaines/Spencers/Baldwins

The Q’s continued to be ignored except when they were paraded out for Alan and Emily’s death. Someone thought it was a good idea to bring Alan back (presumably because of fan outrage) as a humorous ghost/conscience thingy who haunts Tracy because she forged his will.

Someone thought wrong.

While Alan and Tracy’s bantering can be amusing, the fact that Stuart Damon has been reduced to playing a wise-cracking, tracksuit-wearing apparition is beyond insulting.

Oh yes, this version of Alan also got Tracy committed for the summer, but she managed to break herself out and the Q’s continued to shrink as Dillon said adios and headed for Hollywood. Pretty sure Scott Clifton saw the writing on the wall and decided to get out while the getting was good. I think we have a new Ned in training.

Lucky continued to take hits last year and the irony of his name and his life is still sooooooo not amusing. He proposed to Elizabeth, again; married her, again; divorced her, again; and agreed to take care of a son that isn’t his, again. Yes, in case you missed it, Jake is Jason’s son, not Lucky’s because Lucky’s not allowed to have anything.

Scott Baldwin made his way back to town, but the writing for him has been insanely sloppy. Let’s see, history was rewritten and he is now the murderer of Rick Webber and let Laura take the fall for it.

Nice.

Then he sued for custody of Laura and won. It was ridiculous that he won because he is not related to her. If they wanted Lulu to find out about her mother’s rape, there could have been so many other better ways to do it, but God forbid this show do anything that isn’t ridiculous.

Scott’s reappearance to the canvas brought the creation of a new character, his son.

Scott was unaware that Logan Hayes was his son until a DNA test confirmed it. He fell for Lulu, which caused some issues for her father and stepmother given their Baldwin hate, so of course Lulu fell for Logan too. Things ended badly for them after Maxie was tossed into the mix. Maxie became jealous of Lulu after seeing the young Spencer hanging out with her boyfriend Coop, one of the Metro Court hostage takers, and devised a revenge plot. I can’t even discuss this skeevy storyline because it was a retread of the Alexis/Ric/Sam/Jason/Liz/Lucky crap of last summer. I hated it the first time and it wasn’t any better the second time.

Lulu eventually gave Logan another chance in exchange for Scott returning custody of her mother to Nikolas. Of course her reconciliation with her ex isn’t going to last because the GH execs are incapable of keeping Lulu with one guy for too long and she now has her eye on a new mobster named Johnny Zacchara.

The Jones/Scorpios/Drakes

Georgie was virtually invisible in 2007 except when they paraded her out to have her feelings ignored by Spinelli only to finally meet her demise at the hands of another awful serial killer storyline. Way to show respect to the daughter of a legacy character GH.

Way to go, guys. Way. To. Go.

Georgie’s cousin Robin didn’t fare much better this year. Her boyfriend got his HIV tests results back (negative of course) and the whole event was a let down considering the storyline took six months to tell. Patrick and Robin had an amusing storyline in the summer where, with the help of Anna, they helped Noah impersonate an 80s rocker. Ridiculous story, but it was intentionally silly so, I’ll let it slide.

I know everyday is a bad day for Robin Scorpio, but 2007 is now synonymous with the destruction of this character. She broke up with Patrick because she wants to have kids and he doesn’t, which is fine, but why does she have to become unrecognizable in the process? Since breakup # 476 with Patirck, she's just done so many things that are well, out of character.


Jacks/Corinthos/Morgan/Alcazars (aka the mob)

Where do I even start? Carly married Sonny (again) to keep from testifying against him in the trial for Lorenzo’s shooting, while she was engaged to Jax. When her fiancée showed up, not only was she married to her ex, but she had slept with him and then justified it because they were married. Never mind the fact that Sonny lied to keep her married to him. For some reason, Jax got over it and proposed to Carly who then divorced Sonny and married Jax within like the span of a week.

I’m pretty sure that’s some kind of record and no, that's not a compliment.

Of course their marriage didn’t stand a chance with Jax always chasing after his brother, who happens to be James Craig, the psycho behind the Metro Court hostage situation.

Ladies and gentleman, idiotic storyline #643.

Despite all the crap Jerry pulled, Jax still tried to protect his brother and that led to him being taken hostage by Irina, Jerry’s crazy ex. During this stupid storyline, Jax was raped and instead of addressing this socially relevant issue, it was dismissed and joked about.

It’s moments like these that make me pray for someone to pull the plug on Robin and Patrick’s obviously upcoming HIV baby storyline. There’s no way the GH execs could take this seriously and I’m pretty sure the story would end up being just plain offensive.

Meanwhile, Jason got a reprieve from Carly so he could do what he does, no not importing coffee, killing people. Lorenzo’s brain damage turned out to be fake, which made him look like a jerk because he’d been allowing Skye to risk his life for him. She in turn helped Jason kill him.

Ah, love.

This eventually led to Jason’s 395th murder trial which of course he got out of. After dumping Sam, he’s continued pining after Liz now that he knew Jake was his.

Recently, he’s devoted his attention to hooking up with Liz in secret because that’s how you deal with losing your sister.

Okay then.

I thought we could get a reprieve from Sonny the mobster and spend some time with single Sonny, but I was wrong. 2007 brought the return of an old flame from Bensonhurst named Connie. The mobster’s teenage love has since changed her name to Kate and has become quite the fashion icon. I liked her at first because she didn’t fall for Sonny’s crap, but eventually she gave in to his "charm" and she is now just another notch on his bedpost and my dreams have been sufficiently crushed.

Another new face was Trevor Lansing. He had a past relationship with Kate and he is now trying to use the Zaccharas (yet another mob family) to get back at Sonny. God forbid we make this about Ric and Trevor, you know, his father? The reason he is the way he is?

Why is it that the only family that counts on this show are mob families?

Yeah, I don't know either.

So in summation, General Hospital is a shadow of its former self. I’d tell you that things can’t possibly get any worse, but I don’t like to make a habit of lying.

Caps by Clarissa.

How Guza Stole Christmas

There was no freakin' Christmas party at the hospital. It was mentioned, but there was no party.

What the hell??!!

Christmas on General Hospital means party at the hospital. I turn to soaps for traditions at the holiday times. Way to royally screw it up GH!!!

Shall we list all the things that were wrong:

*The only doctor I saw on a day that should have been filled with doctors was Dr. Julian. I guess I also saw Alan, but I'm not sure I can count him. I thought about giving credit for finding a way for Alan to read the Christmas story............ but then I changed my mind. He didn't read the whole thing and then I remembered that he's still DEAD!!

*The only part of the hospital I saw was the waiting area and Luke's room. Neither of which showed signs of the hospital's Christmas party.

Speaking of, what was that??!! Was that ANOTHER dream sequence? Tony Geary did a great job with his monologue, but was that really necessary? Maybe it was because at the end of the show he walked into the dark.

Uh......did they just kill Luke freakin' Spencer??!! Jerks!! If he is alive, the fact that they left a cliffhanger on Christmas is just cruel and twisted!!

*Pretty sure the crappiness of show was compounded by the fact that all of the characters were depressed.

You know it's a sad episode when the bright spot was seeing that Steve Burton finally cut his hair.

Of course that gift was taken away because it looks like Michael's going to carry on the tradition.

Ho, ho, ho? I think not. More like bah freakin' humbug.

Worst. Christmas. Ever.

Thanks to LiznJase for the caps.

"The World is a Darker Place..."

Hate is not a strong enough word to describe how I feel about the creative minds who thought killing Georgie Jones would be a good idea.

How could you murder someone this adorable:


Number one, the timing sucks. Not only is this way too close to the time of Emily's murder, but it's the holiday season. You couldn't have waited a few extra weeks? According to this article, unlike Emily, this really is the last we'll see of Georgie which sucks because she would have made a great conscience to Maxie since that's the role she played in life anyway. I swear to God this is going to be the saddest soap Christmas I have seen in a long time, provided I continue to watch at all.

Second, there is absolutely NO SANE REASON for killing Georgie Jones!!! She is a sweet, understanding, good, loving character with a great sense of right and wrong. Those types characters are a NECESSITY on soaps. Viewers can only handle so many lying, backstabbing bitches who will never admit to their faults unless a character with no agenda and a good moral compass point those faults out to them. Characters like Georgie make us want to be better people and they give us hope that there really are kindhearted people still left in the world, fictional or not.

Another thing that irks me is how she was killed. Georgie is smart. I can buy that her blinders would go up if she thought she was protecting her sister, but the fact that she didn't even think to have backup when she ventured out to the park was ridiculous. The fact that she was out in the open instead of watching from the bushes with say Spinelli to see who showed up, was also ridiculous because Georgie would have thought to do that. How do I know this? Consider the following:

How many capers did she and Dillon get involved in?

Who are her parents?

Exactly.

Speaking of Spinelli, why could no one have clued him in sooner to Georgie's feelings?? This was just cruel, sick and twisted. This way Georgie leaves this world thinking she had gotten involved once again with some unrequited love.

Sick I tell you.

Sick and cruel.

Isn't it enough that you're taking this young, kind character from the show? I guarantee that fact alone is heartbreaking enough with adding all this extra sadness to it. Props to Bradford Anderson by the way. I'm continually impressed when they give him something serious to play instead of the goofy.

While we're on the subject of the mob, they were on waaaaayyyyy too much today. Georgie Jones is the daughter of fricken' legacy characters and she deserved so much more than what she got. Hell, Mac deserved better. He is like the only dad in Port Charles who actually takes care of his kids (his in every way that mattered). John J. York pulled at my icy heart today and it was so awful to see his character so devastated.

Mac: They got her, Lucky. They got Georgie.

No sadder words have ever been uttered.

The person that really got to me was Maxie (Kirsten Storms). Her reaction to Lucky's delivery of the bad news as well as the fit she threw when she was struggling to get to her sister once she arrived on the scene absolutely broke me.

Just like with Emily's death, I am beyond livid with the lack of goodbye scenes due to this idiotic killer storyline. For God's sake, Maxie and Georgie's last scenes involved them fighting over Coop possibly being the killer!! What the hell is that?!! Maxie shared some nice memories of her sister today, but you know what would have been nice? Actually seeing said nice scenes. What about a scene with Maxie apologizing for fighting? One where Maxie tells her sister that she understands she's just looking out for her and that's why she loves her.

Or what about a quick scene with Mac where he calls to check on Georgie and tells her how much he loves her and how proud he is of her? Hell, what about a scene with Robin, you know, her cousin? The person she really has the most in common with? As crappy as the writing has been lately (by recent I mean the last few years), I wouldn't be surprised if we never even see a scene where Robin finds out and honestly, I'm not sure these jerks will be kind enough to give Georgie a proper funeral. I swear to God if this all goes down in Robin's damn blog I will be one pissed off viewer!!

This whole event is an exercise in lazy writing. Writers, you already had an exit mapped out for Georgie, one that didn't involve death. She was going to study abroad, remember that? If Lindze's contract was up and you wanted to write her out, you could have written her into her study abroad adventure early. Maybe a spot opened up in the spring and the professors decided to offer it to Georgie because her good grades made her a prime candidate. She could have fallen in love with Paris (or whereever she went) and decided to finish her schooling there. After all, she originally stayed in Port Charles because of Dillon right?

Still don't want to bring her back at the end of college? Simple. Have her choose to live in Europe. It's not that much of a stretch considering Robin lived in Paris for years. If you don't want to bother stretching your creativity a little because you hate your job or are simply too lazy to do so, then quit and let someone who cares do your job. There are several people out there, myself included, who would care more about good storytelling than the bottom line. What I don't get is why the higher ups can't seem to understand that the former will lead to the latter. I can guarantee that this stunt is going to lose you more viewers that you gain.

As far as I can tell, Lindze is a talented actress who was never really given the chance to flex her acting muscles on this show. Saying there was a lack of story for the character is a load of crap because there was still so many ways to flesh out the character of Georgie Jones. She still had a lot of stories or life (depending on how you look at it) ahead of her.

Spinelli: She shouldn't be dead.

Damn straight. Now if you could convince the writers of this, that would be great.

So have I mentioned in the last five minutes how much I hate, loathe, detest, abhor and despise this damn show?